I’m fucking pissed at everyone and everything and I don’t know why because by all accounts I should be brimming with happiness right now.
I scored the highest in three of my classes on the midterms and all the others I aced anyway. I should be fucking glad that I worked so hard on these tests and did so well, but really I don’t give a shit, mainly because of my bitchy ass friends fucking gossiping about me RIGHT THE FUCK BEHIND ME and just perhaps by dint of the fact that everyone else was so enraged by the end of the day that I caught it through general osmosis. Oh, and I was bumped out of the class presidency when our long lost president returned from a semester of illness.
I guess I really just despise the fact that this doesn’t change anything. I’m still losing my house, I’m still basically an overgrown toddler who goes to school, gets good grades, does his cute little extracurriculars and then repeats ad nauseum, I still can’t see half my famil and have never met m now four year old nephew, and the other fucking side of the family that lives a mile away apparently has more important grandchildren to worry about. No college will give a shit what I got on my midterms in Junior year. my other grades will be equally fine. I just am incredibly annoyed right now. I feel like I’ve just spent an entire semester being class president and dealing with the fucking crazy bipolar advisers and now it doesn’t count or matter at all. Fuck everything.
While everyone else is off driving around and getting drunk and smoking weed and being in relationships, I’m here being all single and innocent. I still have to wait for my parents to come pick me up from school, and I have to ask mom and dad for lunch money in the morning and I’m not allowed to get a job because it would “interfere with my schoolwork” and “my only job right now is getting good grades!” I just wish that I could be at least a BIT more independent and that I could be at least slightly more in control of some things. My only activities are those that I have to be at school at for, and the last time I’ve gone and done something with a friend that wasn’t school related was like, October. I feel like I’m still a fourth grader in a high school body and I hate it.
Life-Altering Picnic Table of the Day: Bring the outdoors inside with The picNYC Table from Haiko Cornelissen Architecten.
“Suddenly, spilling water becomes a necessity instead of a problem and wine glasses need coasters not to prevent ring stains but to avoid tumbling,” say the table’s designers.
The vegetation is very much alive, meaning the table requires constant care, but the reward is invaluable: All the picnic with none of the f*cking ants.
I can’t decide how I feel about this..but I think I like it.
I want this.